Thursday, June 27, 2013

Weighing In - 6/27/2013

Previous weight:  153.4
Today's weight:  152.8

This week's results: -0.6lbs!

Another loss! Another week of not at all tracking, but being mindful and being active. The heat in Minnesota means I'm eating less, and a vicious storm that ripped through my neighborhood like a tornado (70 mph winds) took out my power for 2 days and ruined all my food. I tried to get things into a cooler ASAP, but I had been at work and unaware of the power outage, and then it was too late, and then the power had been off for too long to rescue much more than my condiments.

It was a chance to clean out the fridge, literally, and start fresh. In with the spring/summer veggies! I've been eating mostly cold salads all week with a handful of protein tossed in. Either black beans, chickpeas or chicken and sometimes shrimp. I've been biking around, I went running outside when I remembered that GymPact allows for "Anywhere" workouts now, and I've been working on house projects with Manpanion. Add 6 days a week of work where I'm on my feet for hours at a time running back and forth and carrying things, and you've got a pretty good recipe for success.

I know I could be eating less, but it's summer and I want to enjoy my time. Naturally, as more fruits and vegetables are available to eat fresh, this will take care of itself, and now that power has been restored to my home, I won't be eating what's convenient, I'll be eating what I want and what I've planned for (by buying it.... obviously).

All in all, I'm happy with this test of not obsessing over what's going into my mouth. My body has met it's set point. I could maintain this weight pretty easily without concentrating on anything, and while I know I could still stand to lose about 15 pounds (much more based on the insurance folks), I'm not sure it's realistic for me. I've given it a REAL shot, and my body doesn't like to move beyond this, and even when it does, it's a serious struggle to keep it off.

I've got new muscles popping up all the time, and I am really truly content with where my body is right now. I'm happy that I wake up excited to move, and that when I start to feel stressed I turn to the gym first because I know that sweating it out will move me forward (literally and figuratively) and that eating a whole carton of frozen yogurt (which I also do) will just make me feel like I'm sweating frozen yogurt in this heat. Which is gross. Seriously. Think about it.

Tonight, Manpanion and I are headed over the river to St. Paul to dance some Polka! I love polka. We are serious nerds with our favorites of square dancing and polka-ing, but we're so good at it because we laugh our way through and make up our moves and are pretty in tune with each other's bodies. There have been MANY times people come up to us and compliment our dancing, saying we look like we're having so much fun, which is 100000% true.

Can't wait!

Thursday, June 20, 2013

Weighing In - 6/20/2013

Previous Weight: 154.6
Today's Weight: 153.4

This week's results: -1.2lbs!

I did nothing this week. I didn't track a bite. I didn't even try to listen to my body. I worked out a little less because I had other things to do, and mostly, I just didn't make FOOD the main event of my entire week like I always do when I'm focusing on weight loss.

And it worked.

And I ate pizza. And I ate birthday cake. And I went out and played with my family.


Flew kites.

We built a cargo net for the playground in the backyard. We drew the whole thing out to scale in coordinated sidewalk chalk and did all the math right there. We're awesome. 

Emotionally, it was a hard week, and this week will be no different. I'm not really digging on my new second job. It's never busy, I don't make any money, and I don't have much in common with the other folks who work there - or at least that I've found so far. Being unhappy with this job makes me desperate for really good things in the other areas of my life, which is leading to a lot of disappointment across the board. It was just a hard week. Hopefully I'm able to start turning things around.

Thursday, June 13, 2013

Weighing In - 06/13/2013

Previous Weight: 154.6
Today's Weight:  154.6

This week's results: NO CHANGE. 


Another maintain.

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Checking In: 6/12/2013

This morning I had my annual physical. I am perfectly healthy according to every single test, except of course the BMI scale where I'm still "Overweight." That's not news to me, but I'm starting to wonder if I can ever, really, REALISTICALLY make it into a "healthy weight" category.

I mean, I've lost and kept off 45 pounds, but I can't seem to budge past that point. The women in my immediate and extended family (4 total) have had gastric bypass, meaning we are predisposed to obesity, and I'm the only one who's kept the weight off through sheer determination and not by having my stomach sewn into a tiny pouch.

I'm exercising daily, and have been doing so for the past 6 months, and still I'm in the 150s, hovering around the same weight week in and week out.

I don't want to settle, but I don't know that I can try any harder than this and commit to it for life.

I'm not fat. I'm not unhealthy.

Maybe this is just ok? Maybe I just stay here and focus on stamina and increasing my strength and health? Maybe the new goal is just NOT TO GAIN ANY WEIGHT?

I weighed 157 at the doctor's office. That's with all my clothes on, so I'm interested to see what tomorrow's weigh in will say. I've been tracking every morsel this week, and I've had a particularly active one as well.

I had Monday off, and I dragged Manpanion to Bikram yoga. We biked there on the first nice day that MN has seen in weeks, sweat through 90 minutes of the practice, and then biked off to play mini-golf in the Sculpture Garden. We continued our bike adventures else where and basically moved the entire day. It was completely ideal, and I wish I had the time to do things like this every day, but alas... I must work.

<3 p="">

I've eaten almost every point available to me this week. I have 7 weekly points left, after having earned 53 activity points. I almost always see a gain when I eat all the points, but I'm a hungry girl. I've made very smart choices all week. I've eaten clean. I had ONE treat while out to dinner with a girlfriend. Everything else has been protein, fruit or veggie.

Let's see if it makes a difference. 

Thursday, June 6, 2013

Weighing In - 06/06/2013

Previous Weight: 154.6
Today's Weight: 154.6

This week's result: NO CHANGE. 

Maintained. Whatever I'm doing isn't working, because I feel that I'm restricting myself, which is probably just a selfish reaction to even thinking about restricting myself, and I'm still not seeing results.

Granted, a maintain is better (to me) than a gain, and it's a step in the right direction. Anything that is not a gain means I did something right. I wasn't eating the way I used to, and that's a benefit.

An honest account of how the week went would tell me that I binged a few times at night. I devoured an entire bag of Angie's Kettlecorn, I polished off two pints of Kefir Frozen Yogurt (plain), and ate a few handfuls of nuts while at work that I didn't track, along with some chips and guacamole that I also didn't track.

These things didn't happen simultaneously. It wasn't one GIANT binge, but it was nightly, a little at a time, I just stopped saying no and gave in.

Tiffany made a point a week or two ago that I should stop working out so hard and just relax into an active lifestyle. I don't think I can do that. My morning workout is something I generally look forward to, and it sets my day on a healthy and active note that lasts for at least 5 hours. I need a solution that helps at night, before I go to bed, which is when I tend to want to stuff my face so I can just fall into a food coma and get to sleep without having to think about all the things I'm thinking about.

Perhaps a better solution, then, is to find a way to (interestingly, not whiningly) find an outlet for the stressors that are sending me back and forth between bed and the fridge. A good rule, though, would be to ban food from the bedroom, which I've tried before with limited success, but it's always good to give things another go.

Summer hasn't actually made it's way to Minnesota yet. We've had an extremely rainy and gray spring. We've seen the sun maybe 1 out of 8 days as an average over the past month. It's pretty depressing in and of itself, but it's also not making room for doing a lot of the active things that these seasons generally bring to this state. Swimming, hiking, the like. I'm craving those activities and they're just not ideal possibilities when it's constantly sprinkling, misting or dumping rain.

The thunderstorms are nice though. Honestly.

The biggest change, though, is that I'm used to being EXTREMELY busy throughout the school year. Working, studying, attending class, writing papers, researching, and if I'm lucky, sleeping. Now that I have more free time, I'm definitely not filling it the way I'd like (spending time with friends, or in the sun, or exploring). Instead, the rain and general grayness of the city is keeping me in my apartment, watching episode on top of episode of the 7 seasons of Rescue Me, which I've already seen.

Something is awry. I'm lonely. Perhaps that's a key to the binging.

I'm not constantly surrounded by people like I usually am. I'm recognizing lots of attributes of acquaintances that I dislike, and would not choose to surround myself with, so I don't. I'm finding it difficult to meet new, positive, like-minded people. Being surrounded by sour-pusses all the time has turned me into a hater. I can find something wrong with anything, and I don't like doing that.

Time for an overhaul!

Tuesday, June 4, 2013

Eat Me, the Monday 6/3 edition

Alright, I have another 75% return day on the photographing what I ate before I ate it. 

steel cut oats with berries and banana. added 1 scoop of protein powder while cooking.

big ass salad (all the veggies about to go bad) + cottage cheese and grilled chicken. iced tea, water. nectarine and pluot. 

grilled asparagus and onion with roasted radishes and green pepper on millet with a poached egg. 

Monday, June 3, 2013

Checking In: 6/03/2013

I royally sucked at my photographing project this weekend. I mostly (totally) forgot to snap a pic of pretty much anything I ate, but I did take the time to painstakingly track every single bite, lick or taste. It wasn't very pretty, but it wasn't totally awful either.

We were working hard all weekend putting together Oro's Super Hero birthday party, which we threw 2 weeks early so we could catch all his kindergarten school friends before summer vacation started and kids start to lose touch a bit.

We put together little super juices, which were actually Gatorade, a huge step outside our normal, but they were super cute. Banh mi sandwiches became HERO sandwiches (we made at home and wrapped in parchment), and of course... the CAKES! We had a photobooth, which you can see my test shot, and Paul dressed up as a super hero. 

It was the best!

I ate a lot of fondant, but I tracked it all. I'm not usually a frosting girl, but damn do I love fondant. I didn't actually eat any cake, I just pulled all the candy off. YUM. We also had plenty of veggie and fruit snacks on the table as well. Carrots, celery, cucumbers with hummus. Watermelon, grapes, that sort of thing. 

The kids had a great time, the weather was fantastic, and we spent very little money, so everyone won. 

The weekend was otherwise pretty tame. I didn't binge, but I did have an unexpected high point sandwich on Saturday night because I stayed up too late and suddenly became extremely hungry because I tried to eat dinner early, and had run out of points, thinking I'd be going to bed at my normal time (old person early). 

Time is one of my biggest struggles with Weight Watchers. I'm unsure of how to fit 26 pointsplus into my general 16-18 hour days. I don't sleep very much, and that's natural. I wake up when I wake up, it's not an alarm thing, I just wake up. 

Being awake from about 5:30am until as late as 11:30pm, makes it hard to divvy up a normal eating cycle into three meals. That's a LOT of time to go between, so I snack, but even 3 meals + snacks is really hard to divvy up, and the points just keep coming. Even on days I mostly eat raw vegetables, I still have SOMETHING. 

This week, I work 6 days between my two jobs, so there'll be ample on-my-feet time, and it's supposed to be pretty decent weather, so I'll probably go off route and sneak in a long bike ride on my way home from work today. 

How was your weekend?