Weighing In - 5/23/2013

Previous Weight: 153.4
Today's Weight: 153.2

This week's results: -0.2lbs

I'll take it! This week I did what a lot of us do after a big gain. I weighed in frequently. Daily even. There may have been a day or two where I weighed more than once (or thrice). Each day, the scale told me I was up about 4 more pounds from last week. All damn week I was hovering around 157, and I just could not shake it.

This stress, you know - the stress of possibly gaining SEVEN POUNDS in 2 weeks, caused me to do a little emotional eating, which would have made it easy to actually gain SEVEN POUNDS IN TWO WEEKS.

But I didn't. Instead, I evened things out and managed to rescue the week with a maintain.

This week was tough. I switched my WW Plan Manager to draw from my weekly points before my activity points, but this strategy mostly caused more stress for me as I saw that number dwindling. I think a piece of the swapping from Activity Points first that really works for me is the attempt to always keep or rebuild my Weekly Points at 49, which is the number I start with at the week. It's a personal challenge, plus, if I'm only eating the extra points I've earned, that should pretty much guarantee a loss, yes? It also motivates me to fit in extra workouts if I have the time, and I always feel my best when I'm working out.

I don't feel discouraged like I did last week.

Sure, I wish I had seen a nice, big, well-deserved loss, but I didn't actually deserve the loss this week. I binged on frozen yogurt. I binged on almond butter and chocolate chips. I binged on frozen yogurt smothered in almond butter and chocolate chips. I licked the bowl until I got every last drop, not even noticing the smudge on my forehead.

But then again, it's been a rainy bunch of days here in Minnesota. It has rained nearly every day with the exception of Saturday. The sun has returned today, and I plan to soak up a whole bunch of it before heading off to work tonight.

Until then, it's off to the gym to sweat it out and earn some APs.

Weighing In - 5/16/2013

Previous weight:  149.4
Today's weight:  153.4

This week's results: +4 pounds. 

W. T. F. 

I call bullshit. FOUR POUNDS? I stayed within my allotted points, I earned 50+ APs. I sweat my ass off EVERY day (literally) at the gym. In fact, I have been there the last 17 days in a row.

Something is up, and this feels like a freak accident.

I'm trying my best not to let it derail me and my motivation and determination.

So, while I feel cut this morning, I'm going to eat a healthy breakfast and head off the to the gym and keep doing what I'd been doing and hope things even out. I'm going to drink more water. I'm going to figure out how to stop thinking about this and keep my eyes on the long term goal of simply learning to eat healthfully, which I did this week. I will not relate eating healthfully to gaining FOUR POUNDS in one week.

I won't.

Weighing In - 5/09/2013

previous weight:  150.4
Today's weight:  149.4

This week's results: -1.0lb!

I DID IT!

I'm back in the 140s, ever so slightly, but I'm there.

Thursday was a bigger day because I stopped at a local pub for a $2 pint while I worked on a paper, and even though I made myself a perfectly healthy dinner, I chased it with two mini ice cream sandwiches. 

Friday ended up being a perfectly on point day, while Saturday jumped just a tad over, with the treat of a big glass of white wine. Sunday ended with two of those ice cream sandwiches again (I moved them to the back of the freezer) but also involved eating a big chunk of fresh mozzarella as a snack. I trended toward higher point snacks that day which also included a heavy bowl of granola doused in yogurt. 

Monday reeled me back in and actually ended with an extra point I didn't eat because I just wasn't hungry, while Tuesday jumped back up after a birthday celebration for my dad. I picked my meal beforehand on the restaurant's website, but decided to indulge in a small slice of carrot cake after sticking to my plan. When I got home, I went a little overboard with snacks and consumed another 10 points. And the last day, Wednesday, I ate very clean, but still went over points by about 7. 

I ended the week banking 51 Activity Points and I hit the gym all 7 days. 

I'm so excited to see a loss this week because I really earned it. 

One thing I'm still desperately trying to see, with Weight Watchers, is that the Weekly Points are there to USE. 26 pointsplus per day is barely enough to sustain a normal person of limited activity. The reason the points are low is because vegetables and fruits are free, so you should eat those. I get that. However, to add a decent amount of protein to meals and eat my healthy oils and eat dairy for calcium and just... eat... food, you should probably divy up your Weekly Points to allow for 7 of them to be added to each day, and utilize Activity Points for big treats of nights out. 

I'd always preferred to pull from Activity Points first, because I wanted to earn any extra points I was using, but that was before fruit and vegetables were considered 0 points. I think I may change my planner to draw from the Weeklies first, now, to attempt to rewire my brain into using those because they are PART OF MY PLAN, and then use activity points for anything above and beyond so that I earn those bigger treats. 

A 33 point day shouldn't feel like I went "off my plan." That's still a REALLY REALLY clean eating day, I just chose to have protein at all 3 meals, and with the rate I've been working out lately, I kind of need it. So I will stop feeling guilty about that and find a way to make it work. 

Speaking of working out, the fitter you get, the less calories you burn and the harder you laugh when you walk down the stairs of the gym, literally blinded by sweat and see that you only burned 400 calories in that intense hour. C'mon now. 

I'm not phased because it feels SO good to be working out really consistently for the last 5 months, and I can see definite changes in my body beyond the scale. The scale has never been a good judge for me, so I'm focusing less and less on it, but I do still want to lose the weight. 

I hope you had a successful week! 

Eat Me, the Friday 5/3 edition

Oh I love cooking for myself.

Well, most of the time. My favorite part is just the having fresh, healthy food for myself.

Today I took the time to cook all of my meals. I had two runny, sunny side up eggs over quinoa for breakfast (no color, super unphotographical). And then I had...

Black Bean // Corn salsa salad with leftover spicy chicken (from the sweet potato skins) 

with fresh avocado chunks. 

Roasted broccoli and shrimp over quinoa. THE EASIEST. 

Another totally OP day, jam packed with vegetables and peak nutrition. I feel satisfied, energized and oh so good. I can't wait to see what tomorrow brings!

Eat Me, the Thursday 5/2 edition

In an effort to promote more self-care, I'm cooking at home again. Well, you know that since I just told you this morning.  I was on a roll today. I made that delicious caprese salad for lunch... and then I made:

Southwestern Chicken Sweet Potato Skins with plain greek yogurt and Sriracha

Grilled Peaches with Kefir Fro-yo and raw honey

A totally OP day, and a delicious one at that. I can't wait to see what tomorrow brings to my plate. 

Weighing In - 05/02/2013

Previous weight: 151.0
Today's weight:  150.4

This week's results: -0.6lbs!

STILL SO CLOSE. Staying close is just as good as getting there right now. As long as I'm hovering around the same weight, I know I'm reorganizing my caloric intake to adjust for maintenance at lower weights, and I think that's an important lesson to learn. Even though it still feels like "dieting," because I still have a distorted view of the way I want to be eating. 

I've been religiously sticking to my fitness routine, and with that comes a certain level of hunger that I've become accustomed to. However, balancing work, school and some semblance of a "life," (aka... sleeping?) has made it continually difficult to plan ahead for healthy options and instead I've been resorting to convenience food. Luckily, for me, that means reaching for the Co-op's deli grab-and-go case, so I'm still eating healthfully REAL foods, but I'm wasting money by not preparing my own, and I can only generalize the amounts of ingredients that went into the dish, despite them being listed on the container. 

So, I decided to plan this week and hit up the Co-op's May Day bulk sale, where all bulk items were an additional 10% off. I stocked up on oats, quinoa, millet, almonds, dark chocolate chips (which I keep in the freezer and serve as a wonderful late night sweet-tooth solution) and a host of other things that will keep me on track. I also stuck to the produce section for the majority of my cart options, having picked a few recipes I wanted to try before heading out. Long story short, I made a list and I stuck to it. 

My fridge and counter are full of amazing options. 

In an effort to attempt to better understand what I am eating, I downloaded another calorie counting app to supplement Weight Watchers. I'm interested because I no longer understand the system that classifies their PointsPlus in the way I could understand that traditional points. In essence, I have no idea how many calories I'm consuming. The Weight Watchers system scares me weekly, if not daily, into thinking I'm eating too much. With this other app, I'm being told that my net caloric intake is INSANELY LOW with the amount of activity I perform on a daily basis. Basically, I don't know who to trust. 

So I'm going to continue doubling up for a while, finding a middle ground between these two systems. I definitely trend towards believing that WW doesn't allow me to have enough food, unless I'm consuming nearly 80% vegetables and fruit, which would be a good thing, but I lift weights. I strength train with HEAVY things, and I need protein, and finding a way to balance that muscle building program with Weight Watchers has been a delicate thing for me so far. I'm losing, but very little and very slowly. I'm OK with that. Trust me. As long as I'm maintaining or losing I am A-OK, but I am concerned that I'm not giving my body enough fuel, so I'm trying to play with eating more lean protein and good fats to see how that will work. 

For example: 

Last night's dinner of raw broccoli, avocado and almonds in a mustard vinaigrette with mango.  Whole, raw vegetables with good fats and a little sweet stuff. 

Today's Lunch of caprese salad (tomatoes, fresh mozz, basil and a balsamic reduction). Whole, raw vegetables with [questionably] good fats and a little sweetness tossed in. 

This formula makes sense to me, and from a summer-food standpoint it seems as though it'd be easy to follow. I cannot wait until Spring finally arrives in Minnesota and I can start buying more fresh vegetables because they'll be plentiful. I want STRAWBERRIES, DAMMIT. I want tasty things. Bring them to me!

Is Winter over where you are? Are you enjoying the sunshine and the diminished craving for all things carb? I need vitamin D. 

Thoughts on a Snowy Day

It dumbed another 6" of snow between yesterday afternoon and this morning and the flakes are still blowing around in wind.

I'm tired of shoveling. I'm tired of gray sky and slushy shoes. I'm tired of feeling cooped up.

I am SO DAMN EXCITED FOR SUMMER.

But I'll settle for some semblance of Spring.

I managed to crank out a killer workout this morning after rocking my car out of a mound of snow. As part of my constant strength training switch-up, one of my leg workouts this month is from Fitness Magazine.  The Pistol Squat is a killer and I can't do it at all without holding on to something, and even them my range of motion is pretty infantile. I'll get there.

I also have a gym boyfriend now. He doesn't know he's my gym boyfriend, but it's one of those classroom crushes that you always catch looking at you, and thus, vice versa. He inspires me to work harder because I'd be embarrassed if he caught me lazying through my workout. Plus, CUTE BOYS!

I'm still disappointed by my gain this week, so I've been attempting to plan my meals out and make better use of my points. Lots and lots of vegetables and lots and lots of fruit. Again, longing for Spring when warm weather helps me to crave these sorts of meals rather than a giant bowl of biscuits, give or take anything to go with them.

What's your strategy for the winter-blahs? I am in a RUT.

Weighing In - 04/18/2013

Previous weight: 150.2
Today's weight:  151.4

This week's results: +1.2lbs

Meh. Here's the gain I should have probably had this week, mixed with the 50/50 chance of a loss this week. I'll take it, because it's there on the scale so I have no choice. No point trying to fiddle with the numbers, that's reality. 

I'm definitely disappointed, as I'm SO VERY CLOSE to the 140s and I'm not there. I'm also fully in acknowledgment of the fact that I was working more in maintenance mode this week than losing mode, and I was surprised as hell last week that I didn't gain: so here it is. 

Spring is taking her sweet as time arriving in MN this year, and we've got another 5" of snow on the way tonight. It's almost May and I'm still planning to shovel, which is a complete downer. I'll be completely honest that the weather as of late has taken quite a toll of my mood, sleeping habits and eating choices. It's really difficult to eat fresh vegetables when it's 20 degrees and all you want is a bowl of melted butter. 

I'm still hopeful, however, because 60 degree days will be here soon, and I must keep trucking because I'm still very set on my goals, regardless of the time it takes to accomplish them. The time will pass anyhow, I may as well be productive with it. 

I picked up an extra shift at the restaurant where I tend to snack way too much, so I'm busy this morning trying to plan on how to not touch a damn thing in the kitchen while still taking care of the business I must perform while in the kitchen. I think this is going to just have to be one of those WILLPOWER things that I struggle with so much. I've packed myself a dinner (this is a purely night shift) and I'm going to drink as much water as humanly possible. I'll keep my mind on the 140s and just push on through. It's only 6 hours, I can do it. 

As far as fitness goes, I've been pushing myself at the gym more and more. I reinvent my strength training workouts every 3 weeks to keep my body guessing, and always alternate them through out the week to make sure there's nothing expected on a day to day basis. I still struggle with finding entertaining cardio, but I've been using the elliptical more and more, a machine I'd previously written off as "the lazy girl's workout." And it is. Or it can be. But there are a few programs on there that won't let you be lazy, especially when you crank up the resistance and use your running playlist to make sure you must hit those beats at a very rapid rate. 

When spring and summer finally roll around, I'll have some free time. Some much needed free time for taking care of the mental side of all of this, something that gets sorely rejected and neglected throughout the school year. I want to read books for my own pleasure and write because I want to. I want to sleep until I wake up naturally and spend time in the sun. I want to ride my bike and sprint on sand and swim in the lakes and go paddleboarding. 

All these things will be here soon.