Thursday, June 6, 2013

Weighing In - 06/06/2013

Previous Weight: 154.6
Today's Weight: 154.6

This week's result: NO CHANGE. 

Maintained. Whatever I'm doing isn't working, because I feel that I'm restricting myself, which is probably just a selfish reaction to even thinking about restricting myself, and I'm still not seeing results.

Granted, a maintain is better (to me) than a gain, and it's a step in the right direction. Anything that is not a gain means I did something right. I wasn't eating the way I used to, and that's a benefit.

An honest account of how the week went would tell me that I binged a few times at night. I devoured an entire bag of Angie's Kettlecorn, I polished off two pints of Kefir Frozen Yogurt (plain), and ate a few handfuls of nuts while at work that I didn't track, along with some chips and guacamole that I also didn't track.

These things didn't happen simultaneously. It wasn't one GIANT binge, but it was nightly, a little at a time, I just stopped saying no and gave in.

Tiffany made a point a week or two ago that I should stop working out so hard and just relax into an active lifestyle. I don't think I can do that. My morning workout is something I generally look forward to, and it sets my day on a healthy and active note that lasts for at least 5 hours. I need a solution that helps at night, before I go to bed, which is when I tend to want to stuff my face so I can just fall into a food coma and get to sleep without having to think about all the things I'm thinking about.

Perhaps a better solution, then, is to find a way to (interestingly, not whiningly) find an outlet for the stressors that are sending me back and forth between bed and the fridge. A good rule, though, would be to ban food from the bedroom, which I've tried before with limited success, but it's always good to give things another go.

Summer hasn't actually made it's way to Minnesota yet. We've had an extremely rainy and gray spring. We've seen the sun maybe 1 out of 8 days as an average over the past month. It's pretty depressing in and of itself, but it's also not making room for doing a lot of the active things that these seasons generally bring to this state. Swimming, hiking, the like. I'm craving those activities and they're just not ideal possibilities when it's constantly sprinkling, misting or dumping rain.

The thunderstorms are nice though. Honestly.

The biggest change, though, is that I'm used to being EXTREMELY busy throughout the school year. Working, studying, attending class, writing papers, researching, and if I'm lucky, sleeping. Now that I have more free time, I'm definitely not filling it the way I'd like (spending time with friends, or in the sun, or exploring). Instead, the rain and general grayness of the city is keeping me in my apartment, watching episode on top of episode of the 7 seasons of Rescue Me, which I've already seen.

Something is awry. I'm lonely. Perhaps that's a key to the binging.

I'm not constantly surrounded by people like I usually am. I'm recognizing lots of attributes of acquaintances that I dislike, and would not choose to surround myself with, so I don't. I'm finding it difficult to meet new, positive, like-minded people. Being surrounded by sour-pusses all the time has turned me into a hater. I can find something wrong with anything, and I don't like doing that.

Time for an overhaul!


Amanda said...

I feel your pain on the social front.

Jessica said...

Maybe try a low-key home workout at night? Sometimes I do the BL weight loss yoga video around 7-8pm when I want to eat a bunch of snacks and tell myself that I can have them but only after the workout...and 99% of the time I lose the snack cravings from the workout and if I am still hungry I usually then prefer something healthier instead.

Missy said...

Sorry - I'm a little behind, but seeing the pics from the party you look fantastic! So something is working. You may not be at the weight you want to be yet, but you look great!!

Excited to see the overhaul!