Thursday, January 7, 2010

Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny....

Remember that yogurt commercial? The one with the girl and her bikini, hanging every so obviously in her house. She walks by it every day, eating her yogurt, dreaming of wearing it.

Her motivation.

I wanted that.

When I was 200lbs, it was easy to be motivated on a superficial level. I wanted to shop in "regular" stores. I wanted to wear clothes made out of natural fabrics (WHY is all plus size clothing polyester? Seriously.). I wanted to just be smaller.

Now that I've lost 50lbs, it's a littler more difficult to find that vain motivation. I've got muscles, a waist and I can shop wherever I want. So I rummaged my closet, a virtual clown-car of clothing. There had to be something in there that was still too small or that I never felt totally comfortable wearing. My bikini is out. I will most likely NEVER be totally comfortable in that, and really... I live in Minnesota. I can only wear it for like 3 days a year.

But.. I found this:

It's an H&M stretch jersey/wool blend dress. It's nothing special. I got it used and it's been washed a few too many times, but I love it. I love love love it. I love everything about it.

..except the way it looks on me.

my holiday pudge

my child-bearing hips

'da booty! no complaints there.. actually.

First off, I'd like to echo Roni and state that this is MY journey. Please do not compare me to you or you to me. I've worked hard, I've struggled. I continue to work hard and struggle. What's a comfortable weight or body view for me is MY decision, and I appreciate your respect in that matter.

Second, this dress might as well be re-named as "the second skin." It is tight, it has shape and it leaves very little to the imagination. It is the PERFECT motivation and measurement for my goal!

At this point, I could probably successfully wear this dress out with the right die-hard shape wear and perhaps if I held my breath and didn't eat or drink a drop... but where's the fun in that?

I hung the dress up in my closet 2 days ago, and each morning when I go in there to pull out my clothes for the day, I stop for a minute and imagine "goal-me" in that dress. Hits of a 6 pack popping out from behind the tight fabric and "all the curves a man likes." Goal-me is a BAD MAMAJAMA!

Do you have a vision of yourself when you've reached your goal? Maybe yours is more constructive - arms up, crossing the finish line at a 5k (or maybe a marathon!). Maybe you're healthfully conceiving a child. Maybe you're shopping a sample sale?

Whatever it is, don't lose sight.


JoannaI lo said...

I love this post, and I love the term Bad Mamajamma!

I may try and find an item like that myself.

You can do it!!!

Tiffany said...

Perfect as motivation! And you're right...this is a very personal journey. I LOVE your shoes btw, they are fabulous!

antgirl said...

Motiviation in any form is wonderful.

I think you look great now.

I have a pair of jeans I would love to be less snug. Thanks for the inspiration.

totegirl said...

Good lawd you are a sexy beast! But yes, never lose sight. You are right. I did the stairs at lunch today because it's just so damn FREEZING down here. AHAHAHAHAHA! It's so much fun to say that to you! But yeah, motivation clothing is way better than the damn scale anyday. I should whip out my old motivation dress. Bet that thing falls off me by now.


Holly L. said...

Yes! Fantastic post! I have a few items I dream of feeling confident in some day including a beautiful wool sweater I accidentally put in the washing machine. It's maybe one size smaller than it was when I bought it and I would loooove to be able to wear it again.

I love that you're confident and unapologetic about your goals. Thank you for sharing that with us!

Glam said...

My goal vision is so driven by vanity. Skinny jeans, boots that fit my calves, tight dresses, short skirts -- I'm obsessed.

Right now, it's a particularly annoying pair of jeans that I've been trying to squeeze into for a couple months now. Dammit, now I'm pissed. Stupid effing trainers. Anyway, those bitches are fit like a dream soon!

Good luck with that dress. It's rockin',

Jessitracker said...

Holiday pudge? Pfft. You look fantastic!

Rebecca said...

I agree with Jessi... what Holiday pudge?!

you look great!!!

and awesome shoot!

The Road Curves Ahead said...

Great post... it's too easy to lose sight of goals. I am at a size 14 for the first time in my life and I was getting content because I feel healthy and normal. Not to mention that it's winter so I can cover myself with layers. But with the new year and summer coming in a few months I want this to be the first summer I don't feel like covering up with a t-shirt and towel the very second I come out of the pool. I want to strut around in my bathing suit and feel fine about it.

Sonya said...

OMG, you are such a fit bird!:-) I love it!

And you're right, never losing sight of the goal is SO bloody important.

THANK you a million times over for your comment on my blog today. Re: taking on change during change - you should know! You quit smoking, which is SOOOOOO awesome in my books.