Thursday, January 7, 2010
Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny....
Remember that yogurt commercial? The one with the girl and her bikini, hanging every so obviously in her house. She walks by it every day, eating her yogurt, dreaming of wearing it.
I wanted that.
When I was 200lbs, it was easy to be motivated on a superficial level. I wanted to shop in "regular" stores. I wanted to wear clothes made out of natural fabrics (WHY is all plus size clothing polyester? Seriously.). I wanted to just be smaller.
Now that I've lost 50lbs, it's a littler more difficult to find that vain motivation. I've got muscles, a waist and I can shop wherever I want. So I rummaged my closet, a virtual clown-car of clothing. There had to be something in there that was still too small or that I never felt totally comfortable wearing. My bikini is out. I will most likely NEVER be totally comfortable in that, and really... I live in Minnesota. I can only wear it for like 3 days a year.
But.. I found this:
It's an H&M stretch jersey/wool blend dress. It's nothing special. I got it used and it's been washed a few too many times, but I love it. I love love love it. I love everything about it.
..except the way it looks on me.
my holiday pudge
my child-bearing hips
'da booty! no complaints there.. actually.
First off, I'd like to echo Roni and state that this is MY journey. Please do not compare me to you or you to me. I've worked hard, I've struggled. I continue to work hard and struggle. What's a comfortable weight or body view for me is MY decision, and I appreciate your respect in that matter.
Second, this dress might as well be re-named as "the second skin." It is tight, it has shape and it leaves very little to the imagination. It is the PERFECT motivation and measurement for my goal!
At this point, I could probably successfully wear this dress out with the right die-hard shape wear and perhaps if I held my breath and didn't eat or drink a drop... but where's the fun in that?
I hung the dress up in my closet 2 days ago, and each morning when I go in there to pull out my clothes for the day, I stop for a minute and imagine "goal-me" in that dress. Hits of a 6 pack popping out from behind the tight fabric and "all the curves a man likes." Goal-me is a BAD MAMAJAMA!
Do you have a vision of yourself when you've reached your goal? Maybe yours is more constructive - arms up, crossing the finish line at a 5k (or maybe a marathon!). Maybe you're healthfully conceiving a child. Maybe you're shopping a sample sale?
Whatever it is, don't lose sight.