Monday, January 11, 2010

Great Things.

I don't have a ton to report on my end, I've mostly just been staying busy as a distraction and letting my friends know, one by one, face to face, that Justin and I have called it quits. It's interesting for me to remember that a very choice few of them know our real history, our real story, and so much of this a surprise.

It feels cleansing to have these conversations and to be quite honest, I'm proud of myself for being that [honest].

Yesterday I did some more planning for my new single-girl lifestyle, making a list on of all the things I will be leaving behind and need to replace. I'm overwhelmed by the amount of money I'll have to spend in February 2010, but again - excited about the overall change. Change, for me, is almost always positive.

I met up with my friend Crystal at 11:30am for brunch at Kozy's in The Galleria, a very upscale shopping mall in a suburb of Minneapolis. They have an amazing brunch deal. $15.95 gets you a complimentary mimosa, a complimentary caramel sticky bun, and your choice of made-to-order omelets, belgian waffles, minnesota style hashbrowns (butter and some sort of fatty delicious creamy soup mixed in with the potatoes), sausage links, bacon strips, wheat toast, cheesy scrambled eggs, and the list goes on. All you can eat.

I hadn't been eating much in the past few days. I would remember to eat when I looked at my tracker and it was mostly empty. I didn't want to have an embarrassing TRACK ATTACK from Joanna, nor did I want to deny my body fuel it needs to guide me through this stressful time.

I ate a fair amount too much at brunch, had great and reassuring conversations with Crystal, and then we headed across the way to Barnes and Noble so I could pick up It's Called a Breakup Because It's Broken. I was also trying to get my hands on The New Rules of Lifting for Women, but they were sold out. I do believe I've mentioned before that book stores + me = danger for the pocketbook. This particular book store happened to have 6 gigantic tables of clearance items that were marked down EVEN MORE than their original 50% off. I had at it.

I walked in to buy 2 books, and only ended up with one of those, but made up for the loss of the other one by purchasing 8 more books. Plus side? 9 books for $48. That's pretty fantastic.

After the book spree, I headed home, spent some time making nerdy spreadsheets and lists, and before I knew it - it was 5:45pm and I was headed to meet a very old girlfriend for drinks at my neighborhood bar. She and I worked together at Wells Fargo Home Mortgage way back in the day when I didn't realize how much I hated corporate america (as evidenced by my excellent consumerism at the bookstore). We hadn't seen each other in nearly 7 years and she recently divorced from her husband, so it was a timely chat for me. We basically picked up right where we left off, she helped me work through some confusing feelings and all and all I left that conversation feeling extremely validated.

You see, I'm dealing with this journey into splitsville very well because for me, this happened months ago. Maybe even years. I've already broken down over a long period of time, slowly giving it up day after day that nothing changed when it was promised that it would. I had already given up. Talking with Holly, who was in a similar but also complete opposite position really helped me to feel that it's ok to feel this way; That just because we're broken up doesn't mean I should feel like I *have* to break down. We all deal in our own ways.

I ended up being out a lot later than I meant to. I never ate a thing after that gigantic brunch, but knowing I should, I had a salad for dinner and fell asleep reading my breakup guide, the dog snuggled up into my back.

Funny story. At Kozy's, at brunch, at the waffle station, there were little bowls of deliciousness. Strawberries, syrup, raspberry sauce, chocolate sauce and GIGANTIC serving bowls of fresh whipped cream.

Man, did I ever pile on the whipped cream. I LOVE real whipped cream and it was something I was willing to go overboard on.

When I got back to the table and started cutting up the waffle, I took my first bite and...


That was SO not whipped cream. It was a giant pile of butter. In all of my excitement to eat the biggest mouthful of fresh whipped cream, I now had to either spit out what very well might be 1/2 a cup of butter, or swallow it whole. [I spit it out]


Have you every accidentally eaten something terrible? I'm calling Kozy's to tell them labels would have been very helpful in this situation and that they owe me $5 million dollars to pay for the heart attack that will inevitably cause [later in life].

In WAY cooler news...

Rachel at Body by Pizza has hit the 100 lbs mark! Go congratulate her on this AMAZINGNESS!

Jack Sh*t has literally gotten fit. He's in onederland and [re]wrote a song about it.


Rebecca said...

You should create a registry!!

I'm sure some of us lovely blog folks would help you out!!

and how exciting your doing The New Rules of Lifting for Women!! Seriously, Stage 1 may be too easy for you!

I've decided that although he doesn't recommend you do workouts back to back, for this stage I am. I'm just not feeling a whole lot and these moves are ssooo reminiscent to what I was doing with Jillian I don't think it will hurt too much.

Jack Sh*t, Gettin' Fit said...

It's great how opening up and being honest with folks will make you feel so much better.

And thanks for the super shoutout!

Stephanie said...

The Minnesota style hashbrowns sound very scrumptious. I love brunch, it's so decadent.
Sounds like you have a lot of support for this breakup, and that you've worked through a lot of the emotions already. Best of luck along your journey.
BODA weight loss

Tiffany said...

I'm sorry, I had to chuckle a bit about the butter...That's totally something I would do!
I hope the transition into your new stage in life goes as smoothly as possible. It's hard and scary and confusing I'm sure.
Here's to a fab new place.... physically & emotionally.

totegirl said...

That butter story turns my stomach! I've done stupid shit like that before! I'm sort of blind, so once I buttered my toast with my mom's stash of bacon grease. She caught me in time. GAG.

I'm with Rebecca about the registry. I ain't got much, but I'm happy to share it with you!

As for being on your own for the first time in 10 years, well, that was my life in 2008-2009. My husband left me after 10 1/2 years of marriage. I thought I would die. But I didn't, and now I like living by myself. The best part? Flowered sheets, Hello Kitty whatever the fuck I want, and rainbow colored everything else. Good shit!

Nic, I dig your attitude, woman! You're awesome.

Doug said...

Have fun embracing your own life, difficult as it may be at first.

At least you are dealing with it and not closing off to the world.

Remember to smile :)

Glam said...

I'm lmao off at totegirl's comment:
Hello Kitty whatever the fuck I want, and rainbow colored everything else. LOVE it.

I must pick up this weightlifting book - everyone is talking about it!

Good things are coming your way, Nic, because you're demanding it & facing decisions most people choose to ignore. Rock on.

Lor said...

wow, ive done that before. at a wedding, there were plates with these pretty flowered candies on them. so, naturally, i picked one up and popped it in my mouth, waiting for the deliciousness to make me say "mmm," but instead, i said AACK because the damn thing was butter. who the HELL makes little butter flowers on tables?! certainly not THIS girl who would die without plastic plates, paper napkins and a microwave. fancy and lor do NOT belong in the same sentence.

they call it a breakup because its broken has gotten me through SO much. i've lent it to a number of friends -- including my "little" brother -- and i swear by that book. got me through the break up with my ex fiance 4 years ago and every ex boyfriend after that.

chin up up up. you're fabulous!

antgirl said...

I've used sugar instead of salt once accidentally. Yuck! LOL

Love your healthy attitude. I'm am sorry about the breakup. Be kind to yourself. You're going to be fine. You're a strong and together person.

my word verification is feckhed. LOL

takinitoff said...

hey girl! i love all the positive changes you're making in your life! how exciting! so much potential, so much success ahead!

i know you won't forget me, but don't forget i'm going to come spend time with you at the gym! i just wanna make sure it's a week i can go a lot! so, probably not until i start my new job in feb :)

keep up the awesome work - you're so motivating!-Adrienne

imreadytobareitall said...

Well, I think you'll deal with all of this the best way you can. There's no way you should feel. Just feel what ya feel. I ended a relationship of 6 years about 6 years ago, but emotionally I had ended the "in love" part much earlier. I was sad for the friend I temporarily lost (we are in touch now), but I wasn't really sad for the love I lost. I had already dealt with that.

In the mean time....don't forget to eat, kid!

Tony the Pink Panda said...

Why go to The Galleria for lunch when there is a five guys just down the street from there. *drool*